


unfulfilled

by stationlittle



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-14
Updated: 2017-07-14
Packaged: 2018-12-02 03:35:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11500953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stationlittle/pseuds/stationlittle
Summary: Now that everyone is safe, Kandros thinks about talking to Sloane.





	unfulfilled

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you bardofheartdive for the betareading :)

She had been there in the heat of the battle, fighting against the kett and helping Ryder.

He hadn't said a word to her then. No time for reunions, no time for icy hellos.

Now it was the calm after the storm and she was right in front of him, her arms crossed, looking as angry and impatient as he remembered her. She hadn't seen him, not yet. Part of him hoped she would not, ever.

_Sloane Kelly's not who I thought she was._

He knew there was no way Sloane could have read that e-mail he sent to Tann after his return to the Nexus. It was written how long ago now? Two years?

She was the first person he had asked about after his return.

He remembered the shock of being told Sloane was no longer there, that thousands had left with her.

That people, Calix Corvannis included, had died. Talini had refused to talk about it when he had asked her. Only said it had been a complicated situation. Kandros had shaken his head. It had been a clusterfuck, that's what it had been. And he blamed Sloane. The woman he knew and served under would have handled this. A different woman left the Nexus, he was sure of it.

He hadn't realized at the time that Sloane taking the side of the rebels had been  _her way_  of handling this. And it took a long time for Addison to admit to him what happened before his departure from the Nexus.

Sloane had not been aware he had left and she would never have given her approval if she knew.

"She was... really angry. For days after," Addison had said with a sad look in her eyes.

Kandros had simply nodded and left. He was starting to get a different picture of the Nexus leaders. The remaining ones, at least.

Still, the APEX bounty on Sloane remained. And that, he knew for sure that she was aware of it. One APEX agent had come back from Kadara months ago severely beaten with a note in his pocket.

_Next time, you'll find them in a bloody bag. Hope you're enjoying your new job, Kandros._

He had wanted to come to Kadara himself, the risks be damned. Perhaps this was what she had wanted. He would never know.

Now, he just stared at her, wondering what to do when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Ryder," he said.

"Kandros. How are you?" the Pathfinder asked him.

"Doing alright. You?"

"Eh. I'm glad we're all alive," Sara Ryder said.

He nodded, but his gaze was already focused on Sloane again.

"Are you wondering whether to talk to her or not? Because she's not as bad as people say she is."

"Tell that to everyone who received a beating from her gang. Tell that to Mark, one of my guys, who almost died on Kadara."

"Kandros-"

"No, I'm sorry. I'm just… There is some unresolved history between Sloane Kelly and me."

"She was your boss, right?"

"Yes."

"And then she left."

Again, a yes.

"Kandros," Ryder said.

Her serious tone made him look at her. There was sympathy in her eyes. For him.

He didn't deserve it, though. He wasn't supposed to want someone like Sloane. Not this badly. Not this much.

"If anything, Andromeda has taught me that we only have one life. Well, two in my case," she said with a laugh. "But you catch my drift. We can't afford to lose time. Our own, precious time. Do you understand what I mean?"

He did. Years lost, years yearning for something -  _someone_  - he would never get.

"Alright. I'm leaving you to it. Have fun tonight. A little bit, you know. It’s allowed."

He nodded but his mind was somewhere else, far from the victory he was supposed to celebrate.

He felt on the edge of a precipice, as if he would fall anytime now.

This feeling, this was why he had volunteered to leave the Nexus and why coming back to that mess had been so damn hard. Why he put his heart and soul in APEX.

Time passed unfulfilled wasn't worth it.

He closed his eyes for a second. It was decided. He was going to see Sloane.

He was going to try to have a conversation that would at least last five minutes and he was going to hold on to those minutes. His own precious time.

That would be enough. Until the next days, months, years. Until they met again. 


End file.
